During the past few week, while editing Successful Project Management, I had an opportunity learned to discover other ways I weaken my writing.
I already knew about “get” and “put” and “do”–any words you can command a computer–are weak verbs. It's ok to use them to start writing, but my writing is stronger when I change those verbs to describe what I really want. I'd changed “Get people” to “Acquire people.” Luckily, Esther reminded me we don't acquire people in organizations; we recruit, attract, or hire them, but we don't acquire them. (That's why we have review 🙂
I also knew about the “lullaby” words: “just” is my favorite.
But I hadn't realized I was so enamored of “in order to,” “So,” or “Now.” I managed to find all the “in order to” and remove the “in order”. That helped me see what I really wanted to say. “Find a large wall in order to post your project dashboard” became “Find a large wall to post your project dashboard” which became “Post your project dashboard on a large wall.” (That's an example, not a quote.) I started too many sentences with “So;” so I removed them all. (I might have 2 left, in dialogue.) Now, With those edits complete, I could attack the “now” removals. I used “now” as a way to sequence actions, without making a list.
I'm sure I have more strengthening to do can strengthen my writing more. The copyeditor is great, so I'll have lots of ideas/fixes when the copyediting is complete.
Labels: Manage It, Successful Project Management, writing
I have struggled with the same. My words are “And”, “But”, “So”,”Now”, “Therefore” and many more.
(But) I am not an native English speaker, or writer. My fear is to break the flow of reading, making text “square”, not fluid.
Your examples illustrate the opposite. Instead of disrupting the flow, those extra words seem like someone is talking without taking a breath between the sentences. As a listener you get out of breath listening. Removing those words is like adding bars to music: it structures the blur of sound.
(But) Reviewing ones own writing may be a natural thing for bookwriters (and article writers), but engineers are more interested in the information content than the information format. How can we teach technical people to be/become more considerate about the reader of their writing?
I just completed a 16 session intensive course on “Mastering English Grammer and Punctuation.” I’m a native English speaker and thought I was a good writer. The course was hard work; it reminded me how much I had forgotten, and my writing improved significantly.
I recommend grammar girl at http://grammar.qdnow.com/ .
Regards,
nice article. i love how you struck out the weak and indirect words.
my favourite words to kill are any that end with “-ly”.