Barney, a senior manager, said, “I need everyone to return to the office. I'm okay with what they're doing, although I miss the buzz of people doing the work. But I don't know how to build the human connection with them when they're not here.”
I nodded.
“You're always telling me to have empathy with people.”
I chuckled.
“How do I do that when they're not here?”
At the time, we were on a Zoom call. I asked, “Would you say we have a human connection?”
He nodded and said, “Of course.”
“How have we done that?”
He said, “You're different—”
I stopped him. “I have a different role, but I'm a person, the same as the other people. Let's count the ways you already build a human connection. Then, let's see what you think you're missing.”
“Fine.”
Ways We Already Build Connection
Here are three typical ways to build connection regardless of whether we are in person or remote:
- Proximity: how far away we are from each other, which addresses how we see and hear each other. Are we within the collocation distance of eight meters? When we are in the same room, at the same table, or the next desk, we have plenty of proximity to clarify all the little things that arise that confuse us. When distance separates us, we need cameras on and a sufficient backchannel.
- Empathy: how well we understand each other, especially challenges and pressures.
- Belonging: how well we know our place and how we contribute to a team or a group.
That's when Barney said, “I used to manage by walking around and listening.” You might have heard about a “Gemba Walk,” which, loosely translated, means, “Go to where the work is.”
I nodded. “Yep. That's what you can do when everyone is in the office at the same time.”
“I want to do that,” he said. “That's how I can really connect with the people doing the work.”
Barney's a sharp guy, so I'm sure he didn't interfere with people when he walked around and listened.
After a discussion, he decided he could use these alternatives to his in-person walking around and listening:
- Asking for what he wanted
- Asking for help achieving what he wanted
- Scheduled meetings with specific teams
Alternatives to Managing by Walking Around and Listening
First, Barney asked teams if there was an equivalent way of managing by walking around and listening when the teams were hybrid or remote. That was an example of asking for what he wanted.
One team said, “How about you come to our demos? We have them every Wednesday at 11:30 in the morning.”
Barney had a standing meeting then, but he decided he could move that meeting and ask his leadership team to also attend the demo biweekly. (As a side effect, the leadership team changed their meeting approach and reduced their meeting durations.)
There were several other teams, and none wanted Barney or the leadership team at their demos.
That's when Barney said, “I'd like to reinforce my connection with you. How can I achieve that? I'm happy to consider alternatives you recommend.” That's an example of asking for help.
Several teams offered alternatives, most of which involved explaining where they were with their work.
But one team said, “We'd like to connect with you, too. Let's schedule a lean coffee, and here are some times that work for us.”
Over two months, they all worked out the problems. Barney reinforced his feelings of connection—and so did everyone else.
Location Matters Less Than We Think It Does
Barney said, “As the senior leader, I thought I could ask people to work the way I wanted them to. Especially by coming back to the office.”
I nodded, only smiling a little.
“But the more I explain what I want, and the more I ask for help, the better the solutions tend to be.”
“That's because you're not trying to be Superman, solving all problems and telling people what to do,” I said. “You're creating an environment where everyone can succeed. You have the information and connection—and so does everyone else.”
“When do we need people in the office?” he asked. “I bet you have opinions about that, too.”
“I recommend in-person work when the effort is new and risky—and the people have not yet worked together. As a general guideline, I also recommend a quarterly gathering, especially when the work is stressful or risky.”
He nodded. “Thanks. Now, for my next topic…”
This newsletter touches on topics in Behind Closed Doors: Secrets of Great Management, From Chaos to Successful Distributed Agile Teams, Successful Independent Consulting, and all three of the Modern Management Made Easy books.
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Pragmatic Manager: Vol 20, #4, ISSN: 2164-1196